2016: a year of learning

2016 wasn't a great year of running for me.

If I am honest, a few things I'd been doing wrong for a little while finally caught up with me. Turns out, you can follow the perfect training plan and if you aren't sleeping and resting enough it won't pay off.

2016 was, however, a very important year of running for me. I've learnt more about myself, my health and my running this year than probably any other.

The advice I have received from some amazingly knowledgeable and kind people has given me so much to work on in 2017.

Here are some of the things I've learnt:

To train more you need to recover more

I increased my mileage following my 2014 marathon PB. However, my life also got stressful, very stressed. Consequently, building up the training back-fired and I felt awful. Rather than telling my coach, I pushed on regardless, blaming myself for being weak until I hated even going out for an easy run.

In 2017,  I will: pay attention for my need to rest. 

It's okay to take a run reaaaallly easy. It's also okay to admit you are finding the training tough and it's okay skip a second run if you're really tired.

Okay sleep isn't enough

I kidded myself that because I was in bed for 8 hours, I was getting enough zzz. Newsflash...if you're waking up more than once a night and not waking up feeling rested, you're not.

In 2017, I will: continue to fix my sleep. 

This is a tough one for me but I am trying lots of things to sort out my issues with insomnia and it's going in the right direction.

Negative emotions have massive negative effects on training...and you can't just run them away

I felt stressed or anxious way too frequently this year. A lot of this was life changes, but if you are feeling down about yourself or your life situation this will translate to your running.

In 2017, I will: continue to work on staying in a place where my job, my living situation and my friends compliment my running and make me happy.

More mileage isn't always better

I got drawn into thinking that the more I ran, the better i'd get. Turns out this is true up to a point, but everyone has a limit where adding in more miles is counterproductive. If you tell your coach when you are feeling fatigued, they can help you recognise this point and rein it in. However, if like i did, you just keep on pushing, you won't get anywhere.

In 2017, I will: keep my mileage conservative at a level I know works for me as advised by my coach.

You need to be kind to yourself

Feeling tired isn't being weak. Having to ask for help isn't failing. Admitting your struggling isn't complaining. When I started to struggle in running, I also started hating on myself.

In 2017, I will: be kinder to myself. Give myself a break and a rest when I need it.

The talk below really spoke to me. Give it a go if you are guilty of being too hard on yourself.

If something isn't right, keep looking for answers


I've gotten fantastic advice and insight from many people this year: my coach, a nutritionist, a sports doctor and friends. All of it has been so useful. I finally feel like I have a plan to get me back on track, not just in running but in terms of health and feeling good.

In 2017, I will: put into place this plan :)

Here's to a great 2017!

A Question of Sleep

So, after chatting to Nick and reducing my volume training still hadn't been going the way I wanted.

My sessions were still way slower than they used to be, I felt totally flat and to be honest, I just didn't feel like training.

I felt pretty frustrated because I thought i’d fixed everything else that could be causing the decline in my performance. I thought my nutrition was pretty good. My iron levels were finally up and my living situation was much improved. My sleep wasn't great...but I didn't lie awake all night.

It was only when I talked to a sports doctor, that I realised that waking up four or five times a night wasn't normal.

I never wake up in the morning feeling rested. Throughout, the last marathon training cycle my recovery was awful. If I want to reach my potential, I need to fix this.

After doing some research, I started talking to a doctor who has a lot of experience in this area.

I already did most of the things that were recommended online; avoiding blue light after dinner, establishing a regular bedroom routine and trying to avoid caffeine after lunch.

However, my poor sleep has been a long term issue for me and more aggressive measures are needed.

The doctor suggested some blood tests, which revealed a major reason why I wasn't sleeping. I plan to go into detail about my results and what they showed in a future post. For now, just check out the graph below.

To simplify things, my cortisol levels (including night time values) were way too high. Check out this article here if interested)

I discussed my results with the doctor and she made quite a few recommendations to help with my sleep.

This involved some supplements, which I also plan to go into more detail about in a future post.

It also included some lifestyle changes. I need to reduce my stress levels further to reduce my cortisol levels. I'm working on this but having spent most of my life being pretty highly strung, it's a challenge for me.

Another major change I have begun this week is doing my harder sessions in the morning. Getting a good nights sleep after an evening session is pretty much impossible for me. Thankfully, my energy levels are miles better in the morning anyway, so this switch has been easy for me.

So, here goes the start of my plan to fix my sleep and high cortisol/ stress levels...hopefully, soon i'll be sleeping like this little one -->

Sleeping like a puppy...

How to deal with a bad run (or month of bad runs)

I’ve had times (as i’m sure my coach/ family/ significant other) can attest where I have dealt really badly with my running not going well.

I’d like to think that i’ve improved but it is definitely a work in progress.

Right now I am recovering from a stint of overtraining, which I did not deal with well to begin with…and I can’t help but wonder if i’d be further down the road to recovery if I had.

Here’s some strategies I employed:

• I cried - running has always left me a little prone to emotional outbursts. In normal life, I rarely cry… but running can turn me into a human water fountain

• I threw my toys out the pram - I am ashamed of the tantrums I have had about/ during running. Pedestrians have suffered. My phone has suffered.

• I threatened to take up fencing instead - telling everyone I am hanging up my trainers and taking up another sport. Anyone who has seen my badminton, pool, darts (insert any sport involving coordination here) will know this isn’t going to happen.

• I went out of contact - disappearing from social media, avoiding talking to my coach and running at an hour when no one is likely to see me or join me isn’t a cool strategy. No one is going to call 999 and report a missing runner. People will just be a bit p*****d off.

I think you’ll agree this isn’t a good way to deal with things.

Here's a better way to react:

• Put a limit on crying and tantrums - okay, having a minor meltdown for a short amount of time in non- judgemental company can help. Just get it over with and then move on.

• Talk to your coach - when things aren’t going well, that’s when you really need the advice.

• Talk to your friends/ other runners - they’ve been there…and they probably have cake/ wine.

• Run with people - but only nice, positive people who won’t try and initiate a race in your fragile state.

• Don’t spend all your non-running time thinking about how badly you are running - focus on your work or a home/ art project.

• Leave your garmin at home for a bit - focus on running by effort and time.

• Make sessions fun - try new routes, make it a game (Dave and I played a game of making a bet on how many dogs we’d see during a run when I was feeling particularly bad…yes, really)

We all have times where we are struggling with fatigue, slowing paces or a nagging injury. 

Sometimes, that’s beyond our control…but we can (atleast to some extent) control how we deal with it.

From Marathons to Mud

Plans can change pretty quickly; one minute I'm building up to a nice, flat road marathon. Next, i'm standing on the start line of a cross country, contemplating how I'm going to cross a ditch that can be best described as a small river.

"I'm turning round...I've changed my mind!"

If things had gone according to plan, I'd currently be tapering for Frankfurt Marathon. As it happens, nothing went to plan and instead, I am changing my racing flats for spikes and praying that I can remember how to stay on my feet in calf-deep mud.

Here's what happened; I started my marathon training feeling a little off. I decided to carry on regardless. I pushed myself through long marathon pace sessions and ran more miles than I ever had before. I turned a blind eye to the fact that my legs no longer seemed to work like they used to. I ignored the feeling that something wasn't right outside of training; I wasn't sleeping well and my sense of humor seemed to have been left on one of my long runs.

Most people would recognize this as over training. However, being me, I held on to the belief that over training was something that happened to other people. I just needed to push myself harder, surely? Did I tell my coach how I was feeling so he could adapt my training? Nope. Did I back off and get more rest? Nope. Did it work? Um, nope.

Unsurprisingly, I felt worse and worse. Marathon pace became impossible and most runs ended in tears. No, I'm not sure how I let it go on so long either. Eventually, I confessed to Nick how I felt and got some blood tests. This resulted in two weeks of just easy recovery running and the abandonment of my marathon plans.

So now I get a new aim for a few months...cross country. Lower volume and a change of scenery. I've completed two in the last couple of weeks. My first Hampshire League was great fun, though my body doesn't yet feel completely recovered from the beating I gave it. This weekend I ran a local league race, which I enjoyed...the first run I genuinely enjoyed in a little while (and there were four ditch crossings!). Lesson learnt - don't try to push through feeling terrible. Sometimes you just need to rest.

Go, WADAC girls!

If Carlsberg did running races

In over a decade of running, I’ve attended a lot of running races. I don’t remember ever being massively dissatisfied, though this may be something to do with a grudging acceptance that I’m there to run and therefore a bit of suffering is involved. Mile - long queues for toilets my dog would have turned his nose up at and having my name misspelled more times than on my Starbucks cup is all part of the experience.

That being said, I do notice when a race is especially good, and Wednesday nights’ Desborough 10k was pretty special. If I turn up to future races demanding a post race glass of rosé in a diva-esque fashion, here's why.

I’ll talk about the post-race refreshments, mostly because you couldn't talk to anyone else without them mentioning it. It wasn’t quite ‘feeding the 5000’ but over 250 runners were tucking into a delicious hog roast within 15 minutes of finishing so it wasn’t far off. Plus we had water AND wine. I have never finished a race and been asked: “red, white or rosé?” All of the finishers got a choice between a bottle of top quality wine or a medal. I wish I could say I struggled with that one...

Let’s talk about the race itself (you’d be forgiven for thinking one hadn’t actually happened with the amount of chat about the food and drink). The course was a fabulous mix of fields and closed roads. There was no shortage of friendly marshal’s and the route was so well marked even I found it impossible to go the wrong way.

The atmosphere…is it just me or, at some races, do the runners just seem like they don’t want to be there? Well, they definitely wanted to be at this one; the combination of fabulous food, a very enthusiastic race director and beautiful surroundings made this the happiest race I have ever attended. Even the grumpiest runners (You know the type…“How are you?” “Ah, my knee aches" "I was attacked by a goose yesterday”) were enjoying themselves.

I haven’t even mentioned the faultless organisation; top quality chip timing, the super efficient results service, the readily available free photographs (my worst nightmare, but everyone else enjoyed them ;) and the wonderful social media coverage. I’ll just say that if anyone wants to organise an event, take note; this is how to put on a running race.

The London Marathon: reflections on a frustrating race

Is it possible for me to miss my target and still feel some pride? Turns out it is.

If you read my pre-race blog, you'll know that I was in some pain prior to the race and worried about whether i'd be able to run. Add that to the fact that my build up was far from smooth and perhaps you can understand how i'm still happy on some level despite missing my 2.35 aim.

I finished in 2.38.04, 3rd woman off the mass start. Yes, I was three minutes off of my target time. Yes, I feel pretty gutted about that...but i'm not completely disappointed with myself.

Here's why; 2.38 is my second fastest marathon on an arguably tougher course than my PB...and it hurt...Effort-wise I felt fairly comfortable the whole way...but the pain in my bum limited my stride and was horrible throughout. With that in mind, I'm somewhat proud that I completed it one of my best times. That doesn't mean I'm not upset to miss out on 2.35...but it gives me confidence that, once I am pain-free, 2.35 is very achievable.

Despite a slightly painful experience, I really enjoyed the day. There were some absolutely amazing results; to name just a few, I am so proud of my friend Tracey's performance (2.33 and first lady in the mass race) and David's fabulous 6 minute PB for 2.30!

The race definitely made me even more hungry to smash my personal best...Bring on an Autumn marathon :)

A real pain in the bum?

This is a fairly difficult and emotional blog to write. Even more so when I'm not sure whether it'll have a happy or sad ending. Pain is something everyone has experienced and something which I find fascinating. My experiences with pain are way too much to write about in this one blog but I thought i'd share this start of a short story, if only to make people aware of the multi-faceted and complex nature that pain has.

It begins like this. I arrived back from Portugal feeling a lot more confident; 2.35 seemed a lot more likely. Then, suddenly, a couple of days after I got back, my butt started to hurt...I literally developed a pain in the bum...and it's been there ever since.

Some advice I have received on dealing with pain is to try and see it as an interested observer. It's a great technique and one that if I employ, I do actually see my 'pain' as mildly amusing. Given my interest in pain's complex nature and how the mind can create, modify and relieve pain, I'd think that literally having a 'pain in the bum' was a great metaphor. My sore ar** has caused my sense of humour to go on a bit of a run so it's a bit lost on me currently.

If anyone is interested in the pain and the brain, I'd urge you to watch this Ted Talk. It's fantastic and one of my favorites. Lorimer Moseley does a much better job of explaining how the mind can create pain than I could.

This is a fantastic article on pain, which I also find very interesting.

Here's how I see it; Pain can entirely be created by your mind and the level of your pain is not directly correlated to the level of tissue damage. 'Pain receptors' at the tissue level are modified by many influences; these could be your 'fear' about the pain, the 'value of the pain' (i.e. what consequences the pain has for you) and the attention you are paying the area. Here's a good example; a pianist who breaks their finger might experience a lot more pain with it than someone who has the same injury but perhaps doesn't use their hands much for their job.

Having been a runner for most of my life I can with absolute certainty say that I have experienced this effect many times. I've had 'injuries' that have miraculously felt better after being told it was 'nothing serious'. I've had stomach aches, headaches, back aches, all related to stress and anxiety at certain times in my life. I don't need convincing that the brain can be solely responsible for pain in the absence of tissue damage.

However, I'm sure you can see that this creates a bit of a problem for a runner...we push our bodies to the limits...is the pain the result of some self-induced tissue damage or is it linked to fear and anxiety? For me, is my current pain minor irritation made worse by taper - induced paranoia? Or have I done some damage, which I could make a lot worse by running London?

So, this leaves me in one of my least favorite places...limbo. My next step is to get it checked out by my awesome physiotherapist on Monday...someone who fully appreciates the impact stress can have on the body. Hopefully, this will shed some light on whether there is actually something to worry about. I guess i'll have to wait and see if he can get to the bottom of it...